Hi! <Waves>

Funny and honest tales from a made-to-work Dad of three, wobbling, graying, and laughing his way through parenthood. Armed to the teeth with Nerf guns, full of pie, fighting a chocolate addiction, but genuinely honoured to be at least half of Team Parents (yay!).

6 March 2016

Parentday (née Friday night) (née Mother's Day)...

Mother’s Day.
It’s a tricky one.

A part of me feels that celebrating mothers on just one day of the year is a bit wrong.
What about the other days of the year?

If we put aside just one day of the year for Mum’s. Aren't we automatically saying we don’t have to celebrate them for the rest of year.
I quite like my Mum. She's pretty cool. I feel that her growing me and putting me on this planet has, in some ways, really contributed to my health and well being. I feel that saying thanks to her on just one day a year, is a bit pants, really.
Same for Mrs. Amazing and she made three of my favourite people - Boy8, Miss5, BabyBoy1. 
Note... MADE! That is definitely worth celebrating more than once a year. Twice at least.
And surely we can do better than a Sunday in March for Mums?
Why isn't Mother's Day in mid-Summer time? That would be nicer.
We could have a picnic with beer
Mums love that outdoors crap picnics!

(‘What else did you bring?’ Nothing? Why?
‘What about the kids?’ They're sharing... yours… not mine…)

How about if... instead of it being a Mothering Sunday.
We changed it to a Friday night instead? 
That would be better. More pubs open. 
And include the Dads too. Call it Parents Night if you like.
The Dads could get the rounds in and buy nuts and stuff. We’re all in this together anyway. Team Parents (yay!) and all that.
True. Only one half of Team Parents (yay!) actually pushed a person out of them and feed them using only their bodily fluids. But I've compensated for that already.
As I said… The Dads will get the rounds in.

And going out on the razzle Parents Night could be a bit more frequent.
I mean if it’s Mum’s and Dad’s together. That’s a fair percentage of the population. Most of the parents I would say.
So, as I feel we would all agree, let’s change it from a yearly thing. To a weekly thing! Hooray!
Show of hands… Motion carried. Weekly. Nice.
In fact every Friday, all day, should be an extra day off for parents. No work. Child care is free. Half price taxis.
One whole lovely day when Team Parents (yay!) don’t have to adult at all. We could write, not lesson plans like teaching, but instead, parents plans for the kids. Actually good at parenting.
We could sleep! We could actually catch up on your sleep. 
AH AH AH I WANT THAT AHHHHHHH!!! <Runs randomly>
Can you imagine a world where all the parents actually got enough sleep and a chance to reflect on how to parent? Imagine less annoying children would be what the human race would achieve!

I admit. 
I may not have thought everything through, there may be a few teething issues. A few tweaks needed here and there. But it definitely feels like a runner to me.
Every Friday becomes an EXTRA WEEKLY day off for parents. Three day weekend.
“Parentday - So they're less knackered” - #WinningSlogan

<Turns off projector>
Well what do you think?
<Mrs. Amazing looks stunned>
Mind blowing, I KNOW!
‘Let me see if I have this straight…’
<Is grinning>
‘You want to pitch this at work, to your boss, tomorrow?’
Yes! <Is proud of self>
‘Despite the fact it’s clearly a dumb idea’
yes… ohh… <Proudness leaving>
‘And you woke me on Mother's Day…’
Er… <Has regrets>
‘... at 7am to tell me this...’
<Lots of regrets, big, big, regrets> ... Err … <Considers running>
[Boy8, Miss4, BabyBoy1 troop in]
Boy8: ‘We all made you this card, and got you these flowers. We love you Mum’
‘Oh they are lovely! Thank you. I love you all too’ <Kisses all round>
Boy8: ‘We all thought Dad’s plan was stupid’
<All nod>
Boy8: ‘He made us wear these t-shirts’
<Boy8 shows t-shirt saying ‘Parentday - Make mine a double!’>
<Miss4 shows t-shirt saying ‘Parentday - Because no sleep is madness!’>
<BabyBoy1 shows t-shirt saying ‘Parentday - Because they’re worth it!’>
<Mrs. Amazing looks at me dumbfounded>
<Prepares for the worst>
‘… you know... I like the t-shirts… you might have something there....’
It's probably chocolate
‘… and it would be every Friday?’
You mean every Parentday!

(That's a kiss, not a treasure marker...)